Confessions of a Dance Mom

16 Jun

When I had kids I had dreams of them following in my footsteps. I thought they would for sure be soccer players. I couldn’t really imagine them doing any other extracurricular activity. After all, genetics are supposed to play a big role in that kind of thing, right?

To my surprise my son came up to me at four years of age and told me he had decided what activity he wanted to do. Proudly I imagined smelly soccer bags, tournaments, baking in the sun, freezing in the snow and screaming from the sidelines. I imagined making friends with all of the other soccer moms and bonding over stained socks and soccer balls in the house constantly.

Life always has a way of doing the exact opposite of what you want it to do. He proudly said he was going to be a dancer. Yep! A dancer. I had always vowed to support my kids in whatever activity they wanted to do so the next week we were signing him up for his very first dance class. The studio was thrilled to have a new little boy there. As for me, well, I was lost. No, not because he was a BOY who wanted to *ghasp* DANCE. I was lost in the fact that I am about as far from a dancer or a typical dance mom as you can get. Frills and tap shoes and coordination have just never been in my DNA.

I secretly wondered if this was just a phase he was in. Maybe when he started school he would decide boys don’t do dance and that he wanted to be more like the other boys. Yeah…right. My son was never meant to be like anyone else.

I remember his very first recital. He was cool as a cucumber and I was a wreck. Hundreds of people would see him on stage, he would see them and he would panic and run off stage as I was trapped in the audience and unable to help him get through being so mortified. Of course I ended up worrying for nothing. He thrived on stage. He loved it.

Three seasons later Nikkos loves dance more than ever. The stage is his home. This past year he was on a competitive team and it was a blessing to watch him grow so much as a dancer and as a person. Dance has taught my rambunctious child to slow down. It has taught him discipline. It has taught him to ignore the haters. As the big bad mama bear all I wanted to do was throttle the little boy who made fun of Nikkos for being a dancer. Nikkos shrugged it off with the grace only a dancer can have.

This past year our daughter has decided that she wants to follow in her big brother’s footsteps. She wants to be a dancer, too. In her case I was secretly hoping she wanted to do soccer because I wanted her to have her own thing and not just be my son’s little sister to everyone. After their dress rehearsal I knew soccer would become a distant memory. She was hooked.

Gone are the dreams of smelly cleats and soccer bags. Our house is now full of smelly tap shoes and garment bags full of costumes instead. And as much as that isn’t my world I wouldn’t have it any other way.


6 Responses to “Confessions of a Dance Mom”

  1. MirandaOrdonez June 16, 2015 at 2:04 pm #

    Love this! I’m a dancer, too, and our world cannot go on without supportive parents like you!

  2. MirandaOrdonez June 16, 2015 at 2:05 pm #

    Reblogged this on mirandaordonezblog and commented:
    Love this! Such a supportive mama! Us dancers need people like this in our corner!

  3. Dana Cire June 16, 2015 at 3:54 pm #

    I was so hoping for a girl that loved to dance so I could live vicariously through her. You see, I was a Tom Boy growing up and thought my sister was crazy for dancing. I put my daughter in dance and the next thing I knew she wanted to be on a soccer field like her big brother. She had many of her friends playing soccer too. I didn’t go to 4 hour dance concerts; I went to soccer tournaments in other states. Both of my children rather be outside in the baking sun, rain, and yes, snow. I would not have them any other way too. However, now I get to live vicariously through my grand kids (all three love dance) and stay in a nice air conditioned auditorium where there is “refreshments” for their events. I am proud to call of them my family!

  4. Grandma June 16, 2015 at 4:16 pm #

    It is wonderful that the kids are loving what they are doing. That is all that matters.

  5. Her et al. June 22, 2015 at 9:48 am #

    Reblogged this on Her et al. and commented:

    I read a blog that struck a cord with me. It’s about the dreaded moment you realize your aspirations of being a soccer mom have been replaced by the reality of becoming a dance mom.

    I’m the same way. I was positive I was meant to be a soccer mom. Yet there I was registering my 2 year old for dance classes because she never stopped dancing. Dance mom time is supersonic. You blink and it’s 7 years later and your little one is spending 10 hours a week in the studio and you have 20 costumes split amongst all the closets in your house. Family vacations planned around competition season and intensives.

    And Sissy et al. loves every second of it! She never knew stage fright. I’m in awe of that girl. Baby et al. is now registered for fall classes…she’s two.

  6. KPadgett September 8, 2015 at 7:37 am #

    Loved this blog! I have a little boy (he is only 1) but we will see what he wants to do and I am right with you, if dance is what he wants to do then dance is what he will do. He loves to dance to music along with his 3-year-old sister so we will see! Nikko is adorable and he is lucky to have parents who support his interests!

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