Rest In Peace Jessica Ridgeway

2 Nov

I have been avoiding writing this post. I feel like I have so much to say, but it wouldn’t come out right. The pain I feel for this family wouldn’t be conveyed. The loss for our community is so great that there aren’t even words that would do the feeling justice.

On Friday, October 5th a beautiful little girl named Jessica Ridgeway never made it to school. Her mom saw her off to school and she never made it the three blocks to meet her friends so they could all walk together. An Amber Alert went out for Jessica at 9:15pm and my heart sank. A ten year old girl doesn’t just go missing. Over twelve hours had passed since the girl had been seen last. She could have been states away.

In the next few days the community came together to look for Jessica. My heart was heavy for her family. I couldn’t fathom the feeling of missing your child and not knowing if they were safe or even alive. At 7:30pm on October 10th the Westminster Police Department announced that they had found a body, but did not say if it was linked to Jessica in any way. I knew it was. I think everyone did. Our community held on to the hope that it wasn’t Jessica’s body, but even if it wasn’t hers it was someone’s body and someone’s family would be missing them.

I was in tears while watching the news. I hadn’t stopped thinking about Jessica. Whenever I closed my eyes I saw her smile. I wondered how her mother was able to function, to breathe.

During that week I wasn’t able to sleep. When my husband worked nights I was paralyzed with fear. I triple checked that my doors and windows were all locked. I lay in bed in silence out of fear that if I had the tv on I wouldn’t be able to hear someone coming in and abducting my own children. I even contemplated sleeping with a knife under my mattress, but decided against it because the kids had access to my room.

On October 12th at 4:02pm the police identified the body that was found as Jessica’s. I cried. I knew it was hers once they said that there was a body found, but I didn’t want to believe it was hers. My anxiety spiked. The person who abducted her and cut up her innocent little body was still out there. Could strike again. As a parent it was horrifying and I didn’t want my kids out of my sight.

On October 23rd 17 year old Austin Sigg was arrested in the murder of Jessica Ridgeway. Everyone was shocked that a 17 year old boy could have done such a horrifying crime. He must have been a very troubled boy. Part of me feels sympathy for Austin’s family, but part of me wonders how they screwed him up so badly that he became a murderer.

I think of Jessica every single day. I pray that she wasn’t tortured before she was murdered. I don’t even want to think about the last images she saw, the last words she heard. I will never forget Jessica and her bright smile. Her murder has changed me as a person. Jessica deserves justice and I want to help give that to her.

Rest in peace baby girl. You will never be forgotten.

3 Responses to “Rest In Peace Jessica Ridgeway”

  1. appletonavenue November 2, 2012 at 10:28 am #

    The saddest death of all is the death of a beautiful child. I offer my sympathies to her friends and family for all that good that will do them. I wish them peace.

  2. Grandma November 2, 2012 at 2:05 pm #

    Tragic. I see why your heart is breaking. ooxxoo

  3. angrymiddleagewoman November 15, 2012 at 8:10 am #

    Far, far too many children go missing and don’t come home. Sometimes, I want to lock my daughter in her room but I can’t imagine an age she can reach that will convince me she will be safe.

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